Sunday, January 29, 2017

Caldwell 3 - Mason 7 months...

Chris asked me today if I was still writing about the boys in my journal.  The truth is I haven't been doing much of anything but trying to survive these 4-5 months.  Now that I am staying home with the boys it seems fitting to record a bit about them.

Caldwell 3 years old - Okay three years old is my absolute favorite.  At the end of summer Caldwell went through a hard stage.  Mason's arrival really didn't seem to bother him until Mason was about 6 weeks old and then it was like - oh this kid is staying.  He started acting out a lot.  I remember one Sunday where Chris and I literally just gave up on church 15  minutes in.  Then all the sudden Caldwell turned three and he is an absolute crack up.  I'm enjoying him so much.  He can talk really well, and communicating is so nice.  December was entirely magical for Caldwell.  His birthday, and then Christmas.  At least once a week he asks me if it's Christmas Eve yet. Chris and Caldwell have been watching YouTube fail video's together or America's Funniest Home Video's.  Watching them together, laughing and enjoying each other is so much fun.  Caldwell is now potty trained and he almost did it by himself.  I'm glad I waited until he was three.  

It's funny how as a mom you always just worry about your kids.  My biggest worry is that Caldwell is not being stimulated enough.  Especially with so much snow.  He always wants to play with friends and enjoys it so much.  However, because I've been working I'm still not very familiar with kids to play with.  My biggest goal with being home is to get Caldwell out of the house.  It doesn't help that every time I sit down to nurse Mason that I turn a show on for Caldwell.  With that, as well as, Mason being a hard baby, I definitely use TV as a crutch and I'm really trying to stop.   I have this fake goal in my head that I want to do 30 days of no TV for Caldwell and I.  I also keep telling myself we will shut down TV for the entire summer, which seems more realistic.  Also, I'm so excited for Caldwell to start pre-school in the fall.  Not because I want him to grow up, but because I know how much he will enjoy it. 

Mason 7 months - Mason Bates is the best.  He's rolling over and pivots so quick it makes us laugh hysterically.  I had to order 18 month onesies for our tall little guy.  Caldwell was always off the charts for height, but for some reason I think Mason will be bigger than Cald.  Mason loves Caldwell so much.  They play each morning on my bed and there a lot of times I find Caldwell laying in Masons crib.  Mason has almost stopped nursing.  I'm not sure why.  I went through a really stressful last two months and I honestly think the stress has caused me to lose my milk.  We are nursing about once or twice a day is all.  Which makes me really sad because I really wanted to make it 12 months.

In all honesty Mason has been a difficult baby.  There's a part of me that doesn't want to complain because I have a beautiful baby boy who we couldn't live without.  But I think it's good for him to know the drama he's caused with his screaming and his ability to NEVER sleep.  In 7 months Mason has slept through the night maybe twice.  I have read books, let him cry it out, changed formula and tried what feels like everything.  I've come to the conclusion that he is just Mason and I have to stop stressing about it.  At this point, I just get up and try to love on him as much as possible because I know this time won't last forever.  The screaming is a different story.  Mason is just fussy.  Now that he's digesting things better and he doesn't have a billion ear infections he has gotten so much better. But since I held him so much during all that, now he wants to be held constantly.  He didn't roll over until nearly 6 months I literally could not sit him down.  

These are the photo's of Caldwell's third birthday.  Throughout the month of December Cald had that red rash around his mouth from his nose dripping.  Poor guy.  Even though he doesn't look pleasant in some of these pictures, he was so thrilled.  We have had lasagna and garlic bread on Caldwell's birthday the last two years.  He loves it, so I sort of hope it becomes a tradition.  I also want to remember how much Caldwell loves Rubble from Paw Patrol.  I hope I can always remember his voice saying, "Rubble's digger" for as long as I live. 
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Tuesday, July 5, 2016

Caldwell meets Mason...

To be honest the initial meeting between my two boys left little to be desired.  Caldwell is well acquainted with the gloves the doctor's wear and my old OB used to give him a pair of gloves when I went in for a visit.  So Caldwell was more interested in getting a pair of gloves than his new brother. He did give him some kisses and was sweet for a moment and then moved on. Papa and Grandma Hanks showed up and then all was lost.  Caldwell loves Papa!

I was really nervous about bringing the new baby home.  Caldwell has been in a really hard stage and he wants to be entertained every minute.  He also wants to be outside all the time.  Luckily things have gone better than I expected.  My favorite thing is Caldwell loves changing Mason's diaper. Every few minutes he will tell me the baby pooped and that we need to change his booty.  We like to call it "booty duty" at our house.  Chris is never on "booty duty" but I tell him he is a lot.  Caldwell yells "GROSS" every time we take Mason's diapers off and likes to unfold the new diaper.  It cracks me up. Caldwell has had some melt downs when he's needed me and I'm nursing, but for the most part we've done okay.  Luckily I bought a bunch of dollar store items and some new toys prior.  I try to give Caldwell some attention and a new boy prior to nursing and he seems to do fine.  However, we are starting to run out of toys so who knows what the next few weeks bring.  Also we have Netflix which has helped, even though I hate to admit how much TV he's been watching.  I have to keep telling myself that this is just the season of life I'm in and TV has to be okay for now.

Monday, July 4, 2016

A Baby Story...

Mason Meadow Bates arrived Thursday, June 23rd.  First off, this pregnancy might be the hardest thing I've ever done.  I stopped working on June 1st in part because of high blood pressure, but also in part of just flat out being sick.  My doctor didn't put me on complete bed rest, like I was with Caldwell.  She just required me to rest throughout the day and take naps.  Which was basically a gift from heaven in the last few weeks of this pregnancy.  I don't think I could have lasted working full-time much longer.  In fact I felt like I wasn't fully pulling my weight at work with how sick I was.  I was relieved when my doctor put me out of work.  My mother in law was extremely helpful with Caldwell, coming each day to take him to the park, the zoo, etc.  Then he'd lay by me in the afternoons and we'd watch Curious George or Magic School Bus.  Lots of one on one time and snuggles before little brother came.

On Tuesday June 21st I went to the doctor. She had offered to induce me the week before because I was a 3 and 50% effaced, but my nephew Jade was getting off his mission and I didn't want to miss out on his homecoming.  I also knew family (mostly my mom) would need to be there for his arrival home and not in Bountiful at the hospital, so I put off the induction.  That Tuesday I went in and I was a 4 and 70% effaced.  The doctor stripped my membranes and we scheduled the induction for Thursday in case I made it that far.

First off I never got my membranes stripped with Caldwell and I doubt I'd ever do it again.  I think it just gave me too much false hope and a lot of pain.  Not necessarily the act of getting striped,  but after I had a lot of contractions, bleeding and pain.  Tuesday night I was pretty sure my water broke. When it broke with Caldwell contractions came quickly and there was no question I was in labor, so I waited.  Nothing happened, I just kept leaking so I went to bed.  The next morning Chris stayed home from work because I asked him to and I was pretty sure I was still leaking, but no consistent contractions.  We went for a walk to the park with Caldwell to see if anything happened, it didn't.  At noon Chris told me we might want to go and see if my water had broken.  At this point I had a lot going on down there so I told him we might as well.  We went to the hospital and they told us it wasn't broken and we could go home.  As much as I hated being a false alarmist, I'm really glad we went and just made sure everything was okay.  Getting striped really caused a lot to happen that wasn't labor.

Thursday morning my induction was scheduled.  We got to the hospital at 7:30 a.m. and checked in. Jan had come over to stay with Caldwell and boy was it hard to leave a sleeping two year old to go to the hospital to have another baby.  I don't know why, but I just wanted to hug and kiss him a million times before we left the house.  After we checked in at the hospital, our room wasn't clean, so we had to wait about a half hour for them to clean it.  It had been dirty from us the previous day, same room and everything. Once we got in the room things went really quickly.  Our nurse was good and got us hooked up to everything and the pitocin going.  I was having some pretty consistent contractions, although not painful so once the doctor broke my water things started to speed up fast.  At about 10:00 am the contractions started to hurt.  The hospital I was in was pretty small and they told me when I wanted an epidural to tell them because they had to call the anesthesiologist from home.  It hit me kind of fast, but the nurse got the doctor their quickly.  Getting the epidural with Caldwell was sort of awful but this time I was pleasantly surprised.  I didn't get sick or anything, just sort of sleepy. Once it was in and everyone left I started to get really light headed.  Chris noticed the babies heart rate dropping and I felt like I was going to throw up.  I told Chris I was fine, but he could tell I was about to pass out.  He ran and got the nurse and they said my blood pressure had dropped, which had made the babies heart rate drop really low.  It was the only scary and real painful part of the entire thing.  They gave me some medicine and about noon my doctor came in to check on me on her lunch break.  The nurse hadn't checked me in a really long time.  So when the doctor checked me she was like holy cow, you're a 10!  Let's go ahead and push.  It caught me off guard how quickly everything went.  I started to cry and she offered to let me wait and let it sink in for a minute.  I told her no that I was fine.  I don't know if I was crying out of relief to not be pregnant anymore or the drugs but I knew what was coming this time and was a bit weepy towards the end.  I pushed for about 20 minutes and at 1:11pm Mason Meadow Bates was born at 7 pounds 11 ounces.  As I was pushing the doctor said, do you want to know if he has hair?  Of course I said yes and she said, "he has a ton of dark hair!"  He looks almost identical to Caldwell when he was born, but maybe with slightly darker hair. The the entire birth process and delivery was much easier than last time, and I remember enjoying it last time, so that is saying something.  Chris was more hands off this time.  With Caldwell he was right in there, holding my leg but he chose not to watch too closely this time.  Which I can respect and I think he enjoyed the whole process much more this time too.

After Mason was born we were left alone in the delivery room for a couple of hours to snuggle our guy.  We had lunch delivered and Chris got to snuggle Mason while I shut my eyes for a few minutes. Even though labor is enjoyable, it was hard and I felt so tired after.  We took photo's and sent a few pictures to family.  It wasn't long before we were moved to a different room and we had called Jan to bring Caldwell to come meet his brother.....

Tuesday, February 2, 2016

Pregnancy #2...

I had hoped to do much better at recording this pregnancy as I did with Caldwell.  The truth is this one is just so different and so much harder.  I recall being tired and somewhat sick with C but I don't recall missing work or literally feeling like I can't do anything.  Any energy I do have is in the mornings, so I use it up at work and by 1:00 I'm beat.  To the point I literally go lay in my car and fall asleep with an alarm or just long for a pillow to lay under my desk.  For the record, I've never actually laid under my desk.  This go round I keep thinking, who the hell fought for women's rights. Being stuck at home would be awesome! ha ha just kidding, sort of.

This week I am 30 weeks, so I only have 10 more to go.  Which I know will come quickly but right now it seems like forever.  There's a part of me that wishes I had stuck with my degree and taught school, only because that would mean I would get to stop working the first of June, instead of clear up until my due date.  I'm irrational here people, this baby is killing me.

The other thing I'm surprised about with this pregnancy is how emotional I get and irrational I feel. Poor Chris looks at me half the time wondering where this person came from and I just can't seem to control my crazy.  This last week Chris has been really sick.  He even stayed home from work one day, which never happens and was in the emergency room the Friday night before - for what we thought was his gal bladder.  Then this weekend Caldwell and I contracted whatever he had and last night before I went to bed, I thought I can do this. I can stay up all night with my sick kid and still go to work.  Even though, I myself was feeling really bad. I kept telling myself it was only one day.  I put Caldwell's crib mattress beside a little bed on the floor in our extra room so Chris could get a good night sleep in our bed and we did okay.  Caldwell would wake up with his sore throat and scream saying, "mommy it hurts."  I could rub his back or get him a drink until he fell back to sleep. That was until about 2am when we switched beds and I slept the rest of the night on the crib mattress. By the time my alarm went off I had been asleep what felt like 20 minutes.  So I called in sick and Caldwell is sitting here on my lap feeling slightly better watching Despicable Me and I thought I'd record this interesting time in our lives.  What are the chances we'd all get sick with Chris having his gal bladder issues and me my pregnancy issues?

Sunday, January 31, 2016


Saturday night we got pizza and watched Big Hero 6 with Caldwell.  A moment to remember as I sat on the couch thinking of the many movie nights to come with my family.  My days pass too quickly and because pregnancy puts me into some type of exhausted depression, I want to be better at capturing these moments.  Here's some great things to remember about our month. 

Earlier this month Chris took a day off work to oversee some plumbers who were fixing some of our numerous plumbing issues in our new (old) house. (Seriously, it's been bad. I even puked at one point just talking about how our sewer line backed up.)  C got to stay with Dad and they sent me photo's at work.  Marriage sure does change over time in so many good ways. I think the number one reason I fell in love with Chris is because he was so fun, and hilarious.  He still keeps me laughing, but watching him be a dad is way better than when he makes me laugh hysterically. 

When we bought a house we also bought a cat.  The people who sold us the house left it behind (who does that?)  Chis is allergic and the neighbor said it was good a hunting the mice that come in from the field behind our house, so we had to keep it.  Our neighbor is actually so happy about this cat he feeds it and takes care of it, but it lives at our house.  It's a bit wild, but for some reason it loves C.  My favorite thing is when they walk around and C uses the tail as his steering wheel.  Keep waiting for the thing to attack him.  

C is nothing but trouble these days.  Like this time he dumped out all the spices in the pantry or the baby powder all over the couch.  This last week we got plastic handles for our door knobs so he can't escape and get into things he's not supposed to, yet somehow he still does.  

This Tuesday we are excited to find out what we are having and to know if Caldwell will have a little  brother or sister.  Chris really wants a boy and I'm leaning that way just because we have everything and buying all new girl clothes, etc seems overwhelming (I'm a really horrible and lazy pregnant person) but for some reason I have this feeling it's a girl.  Either way we will be thrilled, and the planner inside of me can start working on that room.  When C was born we were living in Provo in a house with two small rooms.  The extra room stored all our stuff and we were poor so C didn't have a crib.  We just threw the pack and play in with the boxes and he did just fine.  This time I'm really looking forward to nesting and being more prepared than last time.  

Tuesday, January 26, 2016

Pregnant with #2

Here's the deal.  I am the 5th child in my family, by the time it got to me all was forgotten.  We've spent years teasing my mom that I have no baby book, nor any pictures of me because well there was five of us.  I get it now.  When I was pregnant with Caldwell I recorded each week in my personal journal, each ache, pain and thought I had was properly recorded each Sunday.  Now I'm just so tired from chasing around C at church that I sleep all afternoon.  This is my attempt at a record.

We found out we were expecting our second child in October.  Quite frankly I find it physically impossible the timing of this child, but hey timing is everything, right?  Anyway, one day my sister Nancy came up and helped me texture my living room in our new fixer upper house.  More on that later, I guess.  Well Nancy basically did everything and texturing isn't really hard.  By the time she left I was tired I wanted to die. In wasn't very many days later that Chris was around and we were able to take a test and find out. I love the above photo because it looks like Caldwell know's what is going on, but really his nose if just running we had good timing, again. 

The truth is this pregnancy has been a lot harder that Caldwell's.  I've thrown up a lot more but it's not just that.  Every time I've taken a pre-natal vitamin I've thrown it up.  I'm now taking Flintstones chew-ables like a toddler because my stomach just can't handle it.  I think the fatigue is what gets me the most.  With Caldwell I could come home and lay on the couch all night and it didn't matter because it was just Chris and I.  Now I have C to worry about, make dinner for, etc.  It's just been harder.  

The last big thing that's been unique to this pregnancy and not to C's in the headaches.  I've never been someone who suffered migraines or headaches in general.  However, this time I've had two that were debilitating - like call into work sick and hold up under the covers for a day.  Knock on wood, I haven't had one for about a month.  

The truth is I'm just thrilled about pregnancy this time.  I had no idea what to expect the first time around.  This time there's a realization that this isn't a process we go through thousands of times in life.  I'm doing my best to enjoy each kick and look forward with anticipation instead of fear to the hospital experience. Because the truth is when they hand you that little baby your whole world shifts in a magical way and despite the terrible hardships that come with it, I can't wait for the shift again.  

Monday, January 25, 2016

Caldwell Talks...

Caldwell hit the terrible two's the second December 2nd came.  I've been trying my best not to wish this phase away, but seriously if the kid could just tell me what the heck he wants.  This past weekend we've seen some progress, only slightly, but progress is progress and his sweet sentences deserve to be recorded somewhere. 

Chris and Caldwell were running through the house Sunday night. Chris got tired and sat down on the couch.  Caldwell looked at him and said, "Chris.Run.Now!"

I hurt my back.  Friday night I rolled off the couch and dramatically hit the floor joking with Chris.  Caldwell ran over, "you okay?"

My mother in law text me today and said while Caldwell was watching Curious George there was a mom and a hippo on the screen.  Caldwell said, "they happy!"

Caldwell tends to pee through his diaper at night.  I went to get him out of bed this morning and he tells me, "cute Christmas ja-ma's are wet."  (I always tell him he looks cute in his Christmas pajamas, because he does.)