Sunday, May 27, 2012

Turns out I'm not perfect...

I have a tendency to go into almost any situation thinking I'm going to ace it - be the best, or at least kill myself trying. This may come off as overly confident or similarly called cocky.  However, I would like to state for the record that it's a weakness.  I can pinpoint the end of my perfection or rather my self perception of such.  It started when I took the ACT, as a junior, and got a terrible score.  I've talked about it before, but I had to overcome some serious thoughts about me  being smart at the time.  I mean cry yourself to sleep when your seventeen sort of thoughts.  Up until then, I had great grades and the parentals always told me I was smart, but I took the biggest test of my life and didn't get better than average.  There was no way I could possibly be average?

Since that day I've consistently been facing ACT scares of similar proportion.   I imagine myself nailing something, really hitting a hole in one, and then bam!  I'm faced with it again - average, mediocre and sometimes I don't know everything. Sometimes my good intentions even make others feel bad.

Today I faced a big wing dinger - one in which I'm sure will only mean to me what the ACT does in seven years - a whole lot of nothing.  So instead of rambling on about my experience I've come to report the life lesson I've learned today.  I don't have a tendency to think I'm good at everything, I don't even consider myself overly confident.  I've just come to realize I care way to much about things that don't matter. 

I also for the record, I don't know how to stop.

1 comment :

  1. Well shot. I guess I am not sure if we can be friends now. I am pretty sure that I am prefect and all my friends have to be...oh wait. then again I just remembered that I didn't Ace my ACT and I failed that college class once and had to retake. Okay so maybe we can still be friends. :)

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