Tuesday, November 19, 2013

38 Weeks...

I am so anxious for this baby to come.  Not knowing his exact time of arrival is the hardest part.  My body is doing amazing things and I have no clue what any the subtle changes mean. I call Nancy at least twice a day asking something like, “what does it mean if your left thigh hurts consistently for 6 hours?”  Stupid questions I know, but it’s literally how I deal with every twinge of pain or leak I feel.  Pregnancy is tough; I’m not going to lie.  I have complained more than perhaps necessary for someone who has been given such an amazing gift.  Especially the last two weeks, as I literally feel our little boy growing bigger inside.  Last night I rolled over in bed and pain shot through my entire body, waking me up.  I literally fell out of bed, onto the floor trying to stand up.  Chris sat up in a panic thinking I was in labor.  I walked around a bit and had a glass of water and all was well. 

I have been meeting with the doctor for the last two weeks in a row.  Every time I have only been dilated to a 1 and been 80% effaced.  I write this, knowing if/when I have another child than I will want to know at 37 weeks I was nowhere near ready for labor.  I write if/when because no one in my state can rationally think of having more children.  Even though I know it will happen at some point, the very thought makes me want to fall over dead.

The excitement and anticipation for his arrival is far better than waiting for Christmas morning.  Chris and I speak constantly about what we think he will look like and Chris has even been open to discussing names.  Chris’s family has a very distinct face and nose structure.  Something anyone could see consistently if you lined up all his siblings.  I resemble my mom and my brothers quite a bit, so he and I are dying to know what nose he is going to get. 

As far as names go I think we have it narrowed down quite well.  Naming is something I think I will always struggle with.  For the longest time Chris did not want his name used as the middle name.  I think I’ve gotten him talked into it.  The baby’s first name, if we choose the one we’ve been discussing is a bit different.  It’s no secret, but I’m sick of sharing and getting opinions.  I think next time; I’ll be more quite about our options.  There I go again with the next times. 

Truthfully I’m going to miss this little guys butt in my ribs all day.  I remember when we were driving home from camping and I felt his first flutter.  Now I can literally see his butt or legs move across my stomach.   A feeling I don’t want to ever forget.  Pregnancy is a miracle and I think I can say I made it through just fine.  Onto the next step of labor and delivery – I have my moments of fear, but I’m afraid to say I’m more worried about being a mom.  Bringing him home from the hospital and trying to teach him the important things of life over the next 18 years.  Wish us luck!

2 comments :

  1. I am soooooooo very excited for you! Pregnancy is amazing and its such a crazy/wild/emotional ride. What these little babys and mothers go through to get them here is simply amazing. Good luck and just know, YOU CAN DO HARD THINGS! My pregnancy plan got completely changed once I made it to the hospital and just knowing that my husband was there and knew i could do it got me through and the first time that little guy is layed on chest is going to be breath taking! I'll be waiting for a pic to be posted of that little man.

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  2. I love love love this post! I think we should have lived closer so we could google all our symptoms together, because I'm the same way. :p My poor friends with babies have gotten all sorts of questions!
    I can't wait to see what your little guy looks like, I'm sure he's going to be just the cutest thing ever!
    And don't even worry about not being a good mom, you're such a sweetheart and you guys seem like you have an awesome balance of a sense of humor and being totally down to earth. :) You guys are going to rock this! Good luck! :)

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